We've all been there before - a bad day where nothing is working properly, or going the way it should. Frustrated, irritated and maybe even embarrassed, we start to 'punish' our training partner. It seems the most convenient thing to do at the time.
In the worst scenario, prolonged frustration, irritation and embarrassment can lead to hostility and anger. And we all know that hostility and anger are usually petty or unjustified. In most situations, people are oblivious to their hostility. Like dominos it is transferred from one person to the next.
I have seen this more times than I care and would like to help people who find themselves in these types of situations. Let's begin with a psychological explanation for this behavior - it's quite simply juvenile. Think of a child who takes a tantrum in order to get attention or something they want. The solution is to grow up, something very hard for adults to do.
There are many strategies to overcome this, here's the one that has worked for me. If you find yourself in a compromising position, try making fun of your own sense of self-importance. Aggression and anger are part of life and we cannot change that, but we can become friends with it. Try instead to make your faults the object of your humor. Anger and humor cannot exist in the same mind at the same time!
"You grow up the day you have the first real laugh - at yourself"
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